GUIDE TO SURVIVING TEENAGE PARENTHOOD PART TWO
TIPS ON HOW TO BUILD UP SELF ESTEEM, CONFIDENCE AND MOVE ON WITH LOVE
ARTICLE BY: KGALALELO MOTHIBEDI
BEING A TEENAGE PARENT STORIES
08 MAY 2020
‘A CHEERFUL HEART IS GOOD MEDICINE’ (PROVERBS 17: 22)
Every girl that went through teenage parenthood has struggled with confidence and chances are you have too. It’s something that all mothers go through at one point or another.
The problem is amplified by staying in a of low self esteem zone for too long. Like months to years. Most of life success happens in the mental realm before it comes to appear in the physical. That is why it is very crucial to start working on youself from an early stage of motherhood.
Self-esteem is your opinion of yourself and your abilities. It can be high, low or somewhere in-between. While everyone occasionally has doubts about themselves, low self-esteem can leave you feeling insecure and unmotivated. You might be able to identify a few things that are affecting your opinion of yourself (maybe you’re being bullied, or you might be feeling lonely), or it could be a mystery. Either way, there are heaps of things you can do to improve your self-esteem.https://au.reachout.com/articles/10-tips-for-improving-your-self-esteem
A low self-confidence can cause problems in your personal and social life. So, it’s something that is really very critical to tackle and get a grip on it
Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand brake on.” — Maxwell Maltz
Nobody is born with limitless self-confidence. If someone seems to have incredible self-confidence, it’s because he or she has worked on building it for years. Self-confidence is something that you learn to build up because the challenging world of business, and life in general can deflate it
THE BENEFITS OF IMPROVING CONFIDENCE
It comes with no surprise that when your confidence increases that positively improve multiple areas of your life.
Fear and anxiety is reduced
As you are working on improving yourself confidence you begin to overcome the persistent voice inside of you that says “I can’t do it”.
You will be able to refrain from your negative thoughts and take action that is in line with your new values that you are setting for your life. As your confidence improves you’ll be more driven to go for your goals.
when you are confident enough you are less worried about being judged by others. You become less worried about who talks behind your back. With improved self-confidence and self-esteem you will be able to engage with others better.
This will help you to improve your relationship with the baby, with the family and all people around you. It is very important to for the relationship with your baby to be much better than all other people.
I once attended a Tea party on mental health and they elaborated that depression can start from the infant stage with the parents being unaware. It is important to love and bond with that baby. A happy baby makes a happy toddler and hence a happy teenager and a content young adult. Build yourself for the sake of your baby’s well being
Improved self worth
Confidence grounds you and motivates you to be a much happier individual. You come to a point of being content with what you have and you tend to smile a lot. You become to recognize your weaknesses and tackle them head on to improve your self-worth
Here are a few good habits you can start to implement in your journey to self-discovery. They will greatly benefit you, and you will be able to achieve if you apply them into your life, they are not limited, you can add more and more. The list is endless
1. Keep clean and neat
At this stage of your life I guess you know that good and improved self-hygiene are very important in both your life and the baby’s life.it is important to take daily showers( even in that small bowl, it’s a bath, I have been there). Brush your teeth; keep your hair neat as well as of the baby. Clean the room that you are staying in. sweep the yard. When you can afford a deodorant, buy yourself and smell good. It’s a bonus. Represent teenage motherhood in a smart way. LOL
2. Dress accordingly and smart
You are a teenage mother and a school dropout and all people know you have no income so don’t be stressed by this point. The most important thing is to wear clean clothes that you already have.no rush to do new shopping. Keep your clothes neat and well ironed. They will look good on you. Dress your baby nicely and as you look at him you will start to appreciate him and smile when you see his clean cute face.
That smile is an important way to improve your appearance wear the smile every day. Keep company of people that will make you laugh and smile. Find stories that will make you smile and laugh more. It will help you look forward to a better tomorrow
4. Find your mentor.
Every girl has to have someone she’s looks up to, and to have that statement of “when I grow up I want to be like.
She can be history character, a famous writer, activist, businesswoman or someone one the movies or from a famous magazine that you love. Find out about their life values, their habits, goals and life in general. All in all try your best to be the person you genuinely aspire to be.
5. Talk about what you going through
In our days of teenage parenting, talking about how you feel was a taboo due to the stigma and judgement that was placed on us. Now times are different. Seek to associate with individuals in a close relationship or friendship and try to share your experiences with them. People who are always isolated are at a risk of developing severe mental health issues. You can’t afford to allow yourself to be at that stage.
If you can not talk about it then write about it, find a social media support group where you can share your experiences and feelings. The best part about such social media platforms is that you can always choose to remain anonymous and the responses to your post will do wonders in your life. Connect on Facebook especially with such groups and get empowered
Find a mental health activist/ social worker or psychologist that you can be open to them without them judging you. Invest in your mental health. You need it for the benefit of both you and the baby
6. Increase your hope
Religious involvement reduces all psychological stresses you can think of. Religion will only benefit if it is practiced on a very good and well balanced relationship with God. With that relationship with God, religion will be practical and will make you a better person. You will even feel it from within.
The following is a list of things you can do to increase your hope
- Take all negative thoughts into captivity (2 Corinthians 10:5 )
- Change routine and if possible environment
- Think about the past in a very calm manner.
- Read and meditate on regular basis
- Find a very good and supportive social circle
- Remember to always care for your Physical well being
7. Physical exercise
There are many important factors and great advantages of physical exercise. Make social media platforms your friend and find about home exercises that will keep you fit. It will help you both mentally emotionally and physically. You can’t afford not to engage in it. It is cherry on top tour recovery journey
It goes hand in hand with eating well and drinking as much water as you can. Remember what you eat the baby will eat too as you breast feed him. Feed him love.
8. KEEP A GRATITUDE JOURNAL
It is very important to keep a gratitude journal. Keep records of what you have achieved, it will motivate you. You can even use if in the future to motivate others.
Remember every woman has a young girl that is looking up to and want to me like when they grow up. You have a got looking up to you.
Keeping a gratitude journal amounts to the saying that count your blessings, name them one by one you shall you shall receive more
In moving forward from struggles of being teenage parent it is important to keep rooted. You should not be shaken. Instead of carrying heavy loads of sadness, anxiety, disappointment, and sorrow try being the pillar of your own strength.
Be a pillar that is rooted and grounded. Do not be shaken, be courageous. Embrace the power of new transformations and you will start to experience a massive shift in character and be great for that baby. Spread love… spread hope
Keep posted… thank you very much for reading through
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Thanks for joining me!!!. My name is Kgalalelo Mothibedi. I am a mother of four beautiful and grown up kids ( Laone 24, Kaelo 20, Khumo 14 and Obakwe 8.) I look forward to sharing my motherhood journey with you to empower and motivate you that motherhood is indeed a wonderful hood to be in